Big Dumb Plans

The carpocalypse is coming.  Gas isn't getting any cheaper, and despite the host of folks who refuse to get it, the plain fact for anyone who cares to open their eyes, is that more driving is not the solution.  Since inheriting my mom's car, it's been useful on occasion, particularly in the winter when I'm feeling lazy.  But more often than not, it's a crutch, resulting in a prolonged debate between the devil and the angel on my shoulder about how I will get where I need to go.  As the weather gets warmer, the devil wins less--but when she does, I'm almost always the loser, ending up stuck in traffic, frustrated and thinking how much more fun, faster and more pleasant my task would have been by bike.  Even though traveling by bike is hardly a utopia these days, for me, it still beats the alternative 99.99999 percent of the time.  For those .001% times, Jess's car is usually available, since she rides as much or more than I do (having a job and not being a shiftless bum like myself, she actually *has* to leave the house at least four days a week).  We also both have Zipcar accounts (received gratis as perks for involvement with different bike-related projects), giving us the flexibility to get the right car for the job if we need say, a pick-up truck for a dump run.

With that in mind, I've decided to make good on a long held dream.  I've been lusting after an Xtracycle ever since I first saw one seven or eight years ago.  For those who haven't heard of the X, it's a frame extension called a 'Free Radical" which attaches to a regular bicycle.  The wheel base is extended about 15 inches and Freeloader bags are attached to two V-Racks.  A snap deck sits over the rear tire.  That plus a host of optional accessories allow you to carry just about anything on your bike: groceries, ladders, 80 lbs bags of dog food, people, oversize loads.  The size of your load is limited only by your creativity, the length of your tie-down rope, and the strength of your legs.

I never had the money, the space or the need to justify getting one, but I light up every time I see one, and, if the owner is stopped, usually pester them with questions about how they like it.  I've read through pages of testimonials on the Xtracycle website about how it literally "changes your life!"  One of the pros of an X over a more traditional trailer system is the quality of the ride.  The long wheel base means your bike rides like, well, a bike.  I've heard lots of reports that an X rides even better when loaded.  So, you don't have to try to decide whether to hook up the trailer that day, it's just always there.  And we're not just talking nice paved roads here either.  Xtracycles can tackle gravel, dirt and singletrack as well or better than a regular bike. 

Now Surly has teamed up with Xtracycle and made a frame that's purpose built for Xtracycle components. The frame being all one piece means an even smoother ride and less flex in the frame when carrying loads.  They call this new frame, the Big Dummy.  Last week, I got lost in the rabbit hole and spent a whole evening watching Big Dummy porn on YouTube.

So it seems, the time has come to make the leap.  The car will go on sale next month, and the resulting funds will be use to build the bike collection I've always wanted.  Yes, I said 'collection.'   After all the traveling I did last summer, and the $600 I spent on rental cars while visiting folks in California, I swore I would not go down there again without a bike.  After spending a few weeks checking out folding bike options, I took the leap and ordered a Bike Friday Tikit.  Sure, I could spend less on a Dahon, but the general consensus is that Bike Friday has the nicest riding folders of anyone around.  You can get a lot of bike for car money, and I want these to be in the stable for years to come, so I decided not to skimp. 

If you're not a bike person, you might think deciding to get a folding bike would narrow down the choices--but at Bike Friday, they have a folder for every occasion.  Touring? Multi-modal city commuting? Off-road? High end performance? Tandem, triple, four person that comes apart and fits in two suitcases? You get the idea.  So narrowing down the final choice was pretty tough.   I called and talked to Hugh, one of the sales associates at BF and based on my needs, he suggested the Pocket Crusoe or the New World Tourist.  But I couldn't quite get the Tikit out of my head.  The wheels are smaller, which usually means a harsher ride, but Jess and I went down to Coventry Cycles on Hawthorne and tried some out and the ride was pretty smooth. Plus, the folding package is smaller, and you can roll the bike by the built in handle.  And for travel, the breakdown and packing process is a lot quicker than the larger Crusoe and Tourist models. 

After much deliberation, I decided on a custom built Tikit with 24 speeds, touring H-bars and the travel case that doubles as a trailer when you get to your destination.  It'll be yellow and I'm still deciding what to put on my custom name plate.  I'm open to suggestions.

The final steed is arguably the be-all end all of mutt do-it-all bike utility.  It is will also be based on a Surly frame and it's called the Cross Check.  It's one of three bikes that Surly sells as a complete bike, but I'm getting the frame only so I can build it up with just the parts I want.  It will serve as my main commuter bike, but it could be pressed into service for light touring, or as an actual 'Cross bike (I'm getting a lot of pressure to race Cyclocross this year to which I say--we'll see).  I hear nothing but good about the ride quality and versatility of this frame and so far, my test rides have been pretty sweet.  Check out Vik's blog to see what a chameleon this bike can be.

The only really sad part of this affair is that for reasons of space, I'm going to have to give up my trusty Scott Sportster P4, which has been my dream bike up this point and is almost as versatile as the Cross Check.  It's a cushy ride around town, but has front suspension in case I get the urge to go off-road.  I even took it to Bend and took it on some trails that definitely tested it's limits.  I hate to do it, but our garage is not very big.  The Scott has been feeling a little slow for the past few months and I've been wishing for something a little zippier for around town trips.  I can easily rationalize having having five bikes with different purposes, but not two bikes with the same purpose.  That's just crazy. :-)

Jess is also trading her Scott for a Cross Check.  She swears she had the idea first, but I don't know if I'm willing to give her full credit. :) However, it does mean that, once again, we will have matching bikes in the same color (Misty Mountain Grey).  The components might be a little different though.  I keep trying to get her to embrace our twin dork pride, but she's not quite there yet.  The problem is, I've always done my shopping by noticing cool things that other people had and then going to find that thing.  She just happens to live with me, and also have excellent taste in just the kind of clothes/gear I like.  It's really quite convenient.  And besides, I had my Timbuk2 bag first. So there.

So that's it.  By the end of September, I hope to have a completely revamped bike stable.  To sum up the final list:

Trek 1500 (road, speedster, distance events)

Cannondale Rush (MTB (stay tuned for reports from the first shake down rides at Mountain Bike Oregon last weekend)

Surly Big Dummy (Hauling machine for big art portfolios, groceries, girlfriend, granny and whatever else I might pick up)

Surly Cross Check (Do it all commuter, cross, light touring)

Bike Friday Tikit (Go anywhere, stealth superhero travel bike--in bright yellow)

The revolution will not be motorized.

It's Just a Bike Race

Against nurses orders, I stopped taking narcotics just in time to go out for this week's Short Track race. The main goal was not to fall on my face (or any other part). As I rode out to the course, I saw a guy pushing a tall/chopper bike who seemed to be headed towards PIR. Hmmm, strange place for a freak bike, I thought.

I arrived nice and early so I could pre-ride a couple of times. For once I didn't have the sensation of freaking out before the race. The course was surprisingly sane this week. The back field was too wet to use, so no extra start loop and no gravel hill. Can't say I missed it. It was a fast course, with long gently curving grass sections, the usual tight twists, some bumpy descents but nothing really hairy. And they even left one of the logs in for the beginner race. This was no big deal, unless the person in front of you didn't clear the log and you weren't ready for it. The infield was pretty fast too. No huge ruts like last week and only one hair-pin downhill turn. All in all, a perfect course for someone who recently had teeth yanked out.

Before the race, I loaded up on some more Ibuprofen and my post-surgery antibiotic. If I do well, I'll give the credit to doping. If I do poorly, I'll blame it on doping. At the start line, there seemed to be a lot of women who had either never been on a mountain bike or were very very new to it. Beginner doesn't necessarily mean slow, however, as the woman who had never been in a mountain bike race, left the rest of us in the dust. I assume she'll be upgrading next week...

The race itself was even more fun than last week. I didn't have anyone directly slowing me down like last week, until I started passing juniors (and a few men, whoo hoo). I just took it as an opportunity to rest. I started out well, but a couple of women got ahead of me and I couldn't find another gear. I did however, finally stay ahead of Sharon (my neighbor). She already confessed to having spent the weekend doing epic rides though, so we'll see if I can repeat my performance next week (when I will be zonked from three days of MTB Oregon).

I also met my other goal, which was to get air at the finish line on every lap. Last week, the announcer started a big air/style contest and even laid down across the finish line for certain riders to jump over him. Now that's trust. The section just before the finish was a perfect lead up, down hill and then a long straight away. I couldn't really tell how high I was getting, but I was pretty sure my wheels left the ground every time. Despite this effort, I could not get any love from the announcer! I was so annoyed. He had a lot of trouble getting any air from the women last week, so I think he was just not looking, not expecting any air from the women, especially in the beginner race. I had a little chat with him after the race, and I think he'll be giving me a little more love next week.

I'd especially like to thank Rick from Seven Corners/Team Beer for yelling at me to go faster on every lap. I didn't always obey, but it's nice to have a cheering section. I made sure to return the favor.

Just before the final race of the day, there was an exhibition lap by the Zoo Bomber crew. Pictures say it better, so check out the video below:

Crashing and Passing

6/30/08: Another Monday night, another short track MTB race. This week I had my act together but a trip to the vet (sick kitty) put my arrival time only slightly earlier than last week. The difference was, this time I just marched up to the check in counter, where there was no line, said my name and race number and went on my merry way.

A quick visit to the Chris King tent took care of some nagging brake rubbing in my front wheel. I'm still experimenting with the tire pressure thing, so this week, I tried 28 psi, just for grins and giggles, 'cause that's what Sue said she ran last week. I set off on my pre-ride lap and before I got too far, I saw our new Jr team member, and gave her a shout out as I was passing.

As I twisted and turned and twisted through the course the word 'sadist' kept popping into my head for some reason. It seemed much harder than last week. A scientific poll of a core sample of other racers in a number of categories revealed that I wasn't the only one who thought the course designer was just a little bit evil. The worst offender was a steep climb followed by a sharp right turn followed by a quick but hair-raising decent into a hairpin left turn. Sadly, as the beginner women's race lined up, the starter announced that we would be skirting that hill. Darn. Yeah, I had already developed a love/hate relationship with it.

I got a little better start this week, and settled into the middle of the pack just behind Sharon, my neighbor from two doors down. Not a good enough start though, because I got caught behind a lot of slower people going up hills and through technical sections. Right after the start, I had to slow down near the top of the first crest. The rider behind me was yelling "PEDAL PEDAL PEDAL!" but alas, that didn't make the woman in front of me go any faster. I managed to stay in the saddle, but I think she had to get off and run up the rest of the hill.

Next, I got caught behind four people who all died at the top of the gravel pile, and then it was my turn to get off and run. The descent is a lot harder when you're trying to remount your bike at the same time, but I pulled it off.

Once we got into the trees, things settled down. I focused on staying on course and working on my turns. The field got strung out, but this time I could actually see most of the women in front of me for the majority of lap one. That got me thinking foolish thoughts about a top ten finish. But I do come out for fun, so I didn't kill myself trying to catch anybody, just kept to a pace I could maintain.

Things were going pretty well, when I came past the finish line and up into a big hill. The decent is pretty loose dirt and before I knew it, I was on the ground with my bike on top of me and one foot still trapped in the pedal. Oh, I crashed, I thought, even as I was trying to figure out how to get up. It was a stupid rookie mistake really. I had my weight too far forward. A quick inventory revealed only minor scrapes. I hopped on and kept going, but despaired of ever catching Sharon again.

I settled back into a rhythm and as the race went on, I started feeling better and more confident. At the end of the final lap, I had Sharon in my sights and found an extra gear to pass her just before the final turn, which made my night and gave me bragging rights for the week. So imagine my surprise when results came out on Thursday and I was placed 17th, two places behind Sharon. I wrote to the officials and learned that in fact, I'd been sent on a wild goose lap. I got passed by the leader of the men's race and should have been done on lap three, but they were slow figuring things out and passing that on to the races. "Turn on the after burners sooner next time," was the parting advice.

7/7/08: Jess was off work this week, while we hosted her dad, who was visiting from Santa Fe. They came out to watch this week's race. After my course pre-ride, Jess came over to the back side and I gave her my bike so she could try out the whoop-de-doo hills, the only part of the course I thought she would enjoy.

I'm getting used to the pattern now. The courses seem to get more evil every week, and every week, during pre-ride, I freak out and think, no way am I going to survive this! When the race starts, I have little time to think, and more time to enjoy myself. Since I'm still riding beginner, they usually take out the narliest section of the course. In this case, it was a couple of logs that required bunny hopping in the wooded section and a steep downhill into a hairpin left turn. I always make a point to try them out in pre-ride and I successfully got down the hill twice and over the log once.

The race started way over on the back side this week. I've been making it a goal to get better starts and hopefully position myself in front of the people who end up stalling on the technical sections. I did better this time sprinting to the first turn, but then lost some ground by the time we got to the single track and ended up in my usual mid-pack position. This was OK till we got to the gravel pile, where I once again got stuck behind four other people. I had to bust out my non-existent cyclocross skills, run up the last bit and then remount while sliding down the steep gravel pile. I almost bit it at the bottom but saved myself just in time.

After that, things settled down. I started the race already tired and for the first lap, I complete forgot everything I ever knew about shifting. I went up when I meant to go down and vice versa. The heat, plus the huge meal of fish and chips, walla walla sweet onion rings and Burgerville shakes a few hours before weren't doing me any favors. Afterwards, Jess commented on how much slower my cadence seemed than everyone around me (see video). I am known to be a masher by trade, but after looking at the short clips of dad's video from the week before, I have to conclude that I probably had no legs going in.

Still, the woman ahead of of me was pissing me off. She slowed down at every little bump and hill (video 1:30), destroying any momentum I was trying to build up. I made it my goal in life to get by her, and I was finally able to cut her off in the woods at one of the 90 degree turns going between two narrowly spaced trees and up a hill.

After that I just tried to survive, but as the final lap came up (for reals this time) I found another woman just ahead of me and managed to again sprint around the last corner and pass her right at the last hill before the finish line. That felt good.

I yelled to the guys on the side, "Are we done!??" but couldn't get an answer. But I'd heard the announcer talking about seeing the leader finish, so I pulled off, and hoped it wasn't premature. Results are up and I got 8th this week, my first top ten finish. But I still didn't catch Sharon, so I have a nice carrot waiting for me tomorrow. I'm disobeying nurse's orders and racing tomorrow, despite still being sore from having my wisdom teeth out this past Thursday. Priority number one will be not to fall on my face (or any other part), and number 2, will be to see if I can finally catch that elusive neighbor of mine.

I Heart The Onion

New Wearable Feedbags Let Americans Eat More, Move Less

Thanks Daniel, for the heads up.

Pedalpalooza: NP Greenway Ride

Saturday evening we took a tour of what folks from the citizens group North Portland Greenway hope will eventually be a trail which connects Cathedral Park in St Johns, with the Eastbank Esplanade and Forest park via the east side of the Willamette River. I had no idea all these as yet, un-built and often privately owned tracks existed. The ride was a grand adventure.

We started on Waud bluff (never knew there was a name for it), on Willamette Blvd next to the University of Portland. Scott Mizee led the ride, along with Jason Starman and Joe Adamski. The first thing we did was make a screaming single track decent down to the railroad tracks. I immediately regretted not bringing my mountain bike instead, but the trails were totally doable by all the folks along who had everything from road to MTB steeds.

We continued along the tracks and through the UPS parking lot to a look out point on Swan Island. Scott talked about the industry of the island, the history (the spot where those buildings are used to be Portland's first airport) and the sections of trail that have already been created, which we proceeded to tour shortly.

The ride was so much fun in part because I've lived in Portland my whole life, and I had no idea of all the cool paths that were right under my nose. Even with the trail undeveloped, there are folks right now who use them to walk and bike to Swan Island, (where about 10,000 people work now) or on to downtown from north Portland. The finished part of the trail is gorgeous and includes a view point with historical information. It's a great spot to watch ships being built and launched. They try to announce when the launches happen and Scott said they're great fun to watch, and include lots of pomp and circumstance. One of the goals of the project is to attach a bike/ped access bridge across the river to the existing train bridge, which would give great front-door access to mountain biking in Forest Park or just a more direct route from north PDX to downtown.

We continued on through more parked trucks and into railroad-owned territory. On a perfect, warm Saturday solstice evening, there was no traffic and the ride was lovely. The views of the Fremont bridge and downtown were spectacular in the fading evening sunlight. Clearly we weren't the only trespassers, as evidenced by the graffiti tags on many of the train cars. I felt like I was rolling through a scene from Breakin'.

We came out from River Rd, which turns into Tillamook St, and comes out via a bridge over railroad tracks onto a section of Interstate Ave that I ride past all the time. There are two lovely bike lanes on either side of the bridge/road that lead exactly nowhere, since technically, you can't (legally) ride on the railroad path. I've often wondered where it lead though, and now I know.

Most of the riders peeled off at that point to get home or to other PP events, but Jess, T, and I were game to go back and explore north section of the trail. We rode up Interstate to Willamette and back to our starting point, but then kept going through the U of P campus. Down another steep hill (paved this time) and soon we were back along the railroad tracks. As we bumped along the large thick gravel next to the tracks, I wished once again that I had my MTB--I would have given it to Jess. Her broken wrist is mostly healed but still in pain every day. We weren't expecting quite this much adventure when we signed onto this ride. Although we both had a good time, a little full suspension would have been nice for her to have on a lot of sections.

She came through like the trooper she is though. Our next stop was a cove near the train bridge that goes across the Willamette near Ida St and the Fred Meyer in St Johns. I had often looked down on it from the bluff, but being up close was very cool. The area down there is pretty sketchy and I would *never* go down there without a group. We saw some folks that probably live down there and skirted one look out point after hearing evidence of a rowdy solstice party going on.

We did climb the stairs to stand on the train bridge and we treated to a train coming through just at that moment. There were two tracks on the bridge so it was plenty safe for us to stand on the sidelines and watch it go by. It was amazingly cool and made even better when the conductor, who looked far too young to be so curmudgeonly, leaned out of his window and yelled, "Get out of here!" Perfect.

As we climbed down the stairs, I couldn't help but ask, "When do we find the body and pull a gun on Ace?" We came out into Cathedral Park just as the sun was setting over the St John's bridge.

Thanks to Scott for showing me I don't know nearly everything about Portland. I'm excited that cool people are working to make this trail happen. Scott said they may try to do the ride tours monthly, which I think would be great for creating interest in the trail and getting the word out. The wheels of transportation are slow, and what they most need right now is a group of people they can call on in key moments to agitate the right political powers-that-be.

Check out their site to get more info and sign up for the email list.

Created with Admarket's flickrSLiDR.

Sunday Parkways

As we pulled out of the garage at 8:15 Sunday morning, on our way to Portland's biggest block party, Jess announced, "It's raining out here."

So. Typically. Portland.

Well it's also typically Portland to carry on in the face of raindrops, so after going back for our jackets, which we had hoped to retire for the summer, we set off. J's friend T had left the house in optimistic shorts and T-shirt attire. She turned down the offer of my extra jacket, then reconsidered, but by then she was already soaked. Not only was it rainy, it was pretty chilly too.

We joined the route at Arbor Lodge Park on Bryant St and there were few people to be seen aside from organizers and booth staffers. We worried that turn out might be low for the event, but I felt that A) the weather would improve and B) if you're going to live here, you learn to do things in whatever weather is offered. It was still early after all.

After collecting some Cliff Bar samples and a few of the awesome new N/NE PDX bike/ped maps (thanks Timo!), we continued on over the Bryant St bridge to Peninsula park, which would be our station for the next several hours. T had an engagement, not to mention she was miserable, so she headed home. I chased down a guy on a Big Dummy to pick his brain about it before picking up my volunteer T-shirt and reporting to our post.

We had volunteered to help sell and fit helmets, which were being sold for $5 each through Trauma Nurses Talk Tough at Emanuel hospital. Helmet fitting doesn't seem like it would be fun, but I actually quite enjoy it, and I'm good at it. Things started out slow, but soon there was nothing but a sea of heads waiting to be fitted. I had a blast seeing how happy people were to get a new helmet and in some cases, find out how comfortable they can really be. I also had parents bring their children over who already had helmets, just to ask if they were properly fitted. It's such a better feeling than seeing all the naked heads on bikes and resisting the urge to lecture them.

Speaking of naked heads, if you or someone you know has one that needs covering, the trauma nurses are holding more sales on the following dates:

Emanuel Hospital Atrium: 2801 N Gantenbein Ave - Portland, Oregon

June 26th (That's tomorrow!)
July 17th
August 14th

Legacy Mt. Hood Medical Center Kids Fair: 24800 SE Stark St. - Gresham, Oregon

Saturday September 13, 2007 10 am to 2 pm

Helmets sizes in toddler to adult. Spread the word.

Two old family friends showed up and I settled their helmets over their considerable cushions of hair and they left smiling. I fussed around the tiny head of the most patient two year old I've ever seen. I met 'mystery black guy rider' Ernie, who I see around in the neighborhood but never actually got to meet. I hope the little guy (maybe 8 or 9) with dreadlocks eventually submitted to a fitting--when I got distracted with another customer, his dad was lecturing him about how he couldn't 'be like the racers' unless he had a helmet. The first person we met when we arrived was Nancy, a feisty red head who was in charge of taking the $Lincolns. Later, she was outted as Janis McDonald's mom--no wonder she was so cool. Jess wound up on the channel 6 news (0:58).

Time flew by and before I knew it, our shift was over and the sun was starting to peek out of the clouds. By the time we made it back onto the route, it was truly a summer day. The streets were completely packed with happy people. We bought a few baked goods for Obama, ran into people we knew and thanked all the cops at the major intersections who waved us through, while pausing the auto traffic.

Over at the SEI stop, we said hey to our Little Red Bike friends Evan and Ali and I discovered the African American Outdoors group (my people at last? Maybe...) Our last stop before the route re-opened was the Kaiser stop, where we sat in the city maintenance truck to get a perspective from life on the other side. It was good to get an idea of what truckers see (or don't see) as we share the roads.

I will definitely be writing and agitating to the proper folks to get another one of these going ASAP. Maybe one day we can be like Bogota, Columbia and have millions of people taking back the streets to play every Sunday.

Thank you Portland, may we have another?

We've Had ____ Days Without a Rude Driver

Car crashes into bike race
Originally uploaded by lazarus6

A bike commute should not cause crying. And yet, my girlfriend arrived home last night in tears, thanks to the sheer number of car drivers on the road, who seem intent on taking someone else out as they get from place to place.

Recently, Jess altered her route so that she only spends about four blocks on a main road--Interstate between Skidmore and Alberta--and yet she still can't get home without one, if not several incidents, in our supposedly Platinum Level city. This time it was the driver of a pick up truck who, deliberately and with malice, pulled out from the side street to turn right across the bike lane and onto Interstate, cutting off Jess, and (incidentally) the car next to her.

Jess is not what I'd consider overly confrontational, but even she was moved to yell, "I can't believe you just did that!"

"You guys (bikers) do it to us all the time," replied the equally insensitive passenger. "Why don't you try driving sometime?"

"I do drive, and I'm very respectful."

The driver then proceeded to swerve over into the left turn lane and make a U-turn across the MAX tracks on a red light.

I only hope the accident he someday causes only injures himself and whoever is stupid enough to ride with him, though I fear that won't be the case.

Shortly after that she was unnecessarily beeped at by some impatient woman who needed to get to the red light two seconds faster. The list goes on.

Today her bike is in the garage. She was so upset and frustrated by the culmination of what has been an ongoing trend, that she drove to work rather than risk another series of stupid people trying to run her down in rush-hour traffic. I don't blame her.

I have no doubt that she'll get back on her bike when she's ready. But it's sad that we (and by 'we' I mean all road users) have to worry about getting home alive because stupid people have been given a license to kill.

Earlier today, I was pondering this blog post as I began the ride home from my yoga class at PCC Cascade. Headed slowly along the ped/bike path through the parking lot, I was nearly run down by a driver speeding through the parking lot at 10-15 mph, and completely ignoring the stop sign in front of the path. I put my foot down and yelled "STOP!" at the driver, before my brain had even fully registered what happened. The driver, an old man in his 60's or so, just looked me as he sped on through.

A woman who was walking just behind me and talking on her cell phone, stopped her conversation to chant the license number long enough for me to make a note in my phone. Unfortunately, it probably won't do me much good. A call to the non-emergency police number yielded a sympathetic but basically helpless officer. Thanks to Ray Thomas, I do have the option and resources to pursue a citizen citation, but I'm not sure if even that's worth it, considering he didn't actually hit anyone. Mostly, I wish I could find out where he lives so I can show up at his door and have a chat with him about the importance of not killing or injuring people while trying to get around.

CrazyBikerChick has one of the most excellent open letters to drivers that I have ever read. If you drive a car, but don't ride a bike (or don't ride in traffic), I encourage you to go read it, and share it with others. I just want to get home alive. I just want my girlfriend to get home alive, in one piece and not stressed to the point of tears by people who never learned to share.

Is that too much to ask?

Muddy, at last

Monday night I went out for my first mountain bike race at the PIR Short Track series. It was only the second time I've actually ridden my new MTB, which I've had for over a month. I managed one ride through Forest Park last week and that was it. So it was all or nothing. I signed up for the whole series because when else am I going to be able to ride great dirt, bumps, single track and gravel 10 minutes ride from my house? Exactly.

Earlier in the day I took my bike down to River City to get a shorter stem. While I was upstairs getting helped, there was another RC employee working on a very nice Cannondale belonging to Sue Butler. Her name sounded kind of familiar, so I figured she was pretty good. Next, I stopped by Cyclepath on the continuing search for a saddle that doesn't make me scream after 10 minutes. Bill offered me not one, but two test ride saddles and let me take them for a week. Brilliant! Why has no one ever done this before? There's no way you can really know if a saddle is going to work without some serious ride time. Especially on a MTB, there's no garuantee of keeping it unscuffed enough to return if things don't work out.

At home, I was running late, as usual and had just enough time to pop one of the test saddles on, throw on my kit and ride to PIR. Did I mention it's only 10 minutes from my house? Bliss.

When I arrived, the junior and beginner women's clinic had already started. I still needed to register, but I didn't want to miss some nugget of information that might help me survive the race. I rolled up, and who was holding court, but Sue Butler. She and another woman took us in two groups pre-ride the course.

The problem with riding the course slowly is that a lot of the obstacles require speed in order to clear them. There was literally a huge pile of gravel in the middle of the start lap. I might have freaked out about it, but I didn't want to look wimpy in front of Sue, so I just waited till everyone else was at the top and then rammed my way up. Speed is your friend.

My favorite section by far was the whoop-de-do hills, or whatever you call them. Sue showed us how to push down at the right time to increase speed. And I loved her tip for climbing more effieciently: "Boobs to the tube!" In other words, keep your center of gravity low. One thing not to do is stand up and pedal, especially not on a full suspension bike, as that is just asking for back tire spin out.

We circled into the trees and rounded a sharp corner into several very small, compact bumps. A guy blew by us and promptly crashed in the middle. "Doesn't it make you feel better to see the guys crashing too?" said Sue. "We scheduled that just for you, ladies." Then someone in our group tried it, with not much better results. Sue demonstrated and advised us to keep out pedals level while cresting the bumps, so you don't hit your pedals. But that assumes you have enough momentum to stop pedaling and still crest the bump. Easier said than done. I don't like to think too hard about technical obstacles when I'm on the MTB so I cut ahead and just barely cleared the bumps.

After that I went ahead of the group and finished the lap. I was stressing out about registering. I meant to register by mail earlier in the week but I forgot that stamps went up. I got in line with about 20 minutes to go until my race start.

I saw a young girl also in Sorella uniform and figured she must be our newly sponsored junior racer. I felt really bad about not having time to say hello and gave her a couple of smiles. By the time I finished registering, they were calling up the kiddy racers and I still had to pee and fiddle with my tire pressure. I let out too much air and then had to rush over to the Chris King booth to use their pump. And my saddle had loosened on the ride over, so I ended up stuffing my multi-tool in my jersey and running over to the start line, where everyone was already lined up. I just had time to tighten the seat and hope it was in a decent position. I stashed the tool between two fence posts and squeezed my way up into the women's field right before the beginner men were sent off.

I'd been nervous about the race for most of the afternoon, but there was no time for that now. Thirty seconds after the men, our horn sounded and we were off.

My goals in this race were, as in every race, to keep the rubber side down and have a good time. I really could care less about my finishing place, so I let most of the riders surge ahead of me on the nice wide starting straight. It was much easier to navigate the course now that the race was on and there wasn't much time to think.

I got passed by most of the women I think, but I managed to pass some little kids, so I felt good about that. On the first lap, we had to go through a lovingly hand-made mud pit. There was really no good line, so I just down shifted and pedaled like crazy and made it through. Then there was a super twisty single track section through some dirt piles and then the whoop de do hills. The tree sections had lots of sharp turns but I took it easy. When I got almost to the end of the first lap, I went through a short muddy section and up a steep hill. There was a very good course marshall (or maybe he was just a super helpful spectator), who was always yelling encouragement and helpful advice. He reminded me to quit looking down and instead look out and ahead at where I wanted to go.

I did about three laps I think. After the first lap, I just settled in and literally enjoyed the ride. I passed one woman who was walking her bike, but still moving forward. Good for her. For next week, I need to work on faster passing, tighter corners and pushing a bigger gear on the non technical areas. For the most part, I seemed to have no trouble being in the right gear at the right time.

When it was over, I felt completely toasted. My throat was on fire from the dust and I literally couldn't talk for about five minutes. My friends Simon and Laura, who came to cheer me on, came over and watched me heave and spit for a few minutes while I downed water. If I could just skip the 20 minutes or so immediately after the race, that would be perfect. After a while, I started feeling human again and could chat normally. I saw the Sport women's race go off with Sage (my Urban Assault partner) right in the mix. And I chatted with Laura, a new teammate I hadn't met yet. I didn't find Sasha (our new Jr racer) but will definitely chat her up next week, since I am now registered for the whole series (and plan to arrive nice and early!).

My bike is now appropriately muddy, which makes me very happy. I don't feel like such a poser. I'm definitely looking forward to more racing next week!

ETA: In the men's single speed race that happened just after ours, one of the racers, Colby Brooks, collapsed near the start/finish area. When I could breath again, I went over there to take pictures of the race and saw several people surrounding him and sharing CPR duty. He did not crash, probably his heart gave out, as people said he just collapsed at that corner of the track. Time seemed to slow down. It felt like they were doing CPR forever, and I didn't think he was going to make it, but the EMTs arrived and got him stabalized and he is reported to be doing well and recovering. I have to give huge credit to Mike Murray for having an awesome organized team, medical personal etc. There's a lot of second guessing going on over at bikeportland.org about whether the race should have been stopped, but as far as I can see, things were handled with minimum panic and maximum efficiency. And Colby is alive. I'm sure as far as he and his loved ones are concerned, everything was done perfectly. Get well soon Colby.

EATA (Edited Again To Add):

The results are in and I placed 11th. Not that I'm competitive or anything.

Welcome Urban Assault Riders

I understand the Austin Urban Assault is happening this weekend. To all you riders who have been emailing me for quiz answers: I don't have them. My partner did most of the research, and in any case, I didn't save the answers, nor do they give them out at the race, since they re-use the quiz, as you have likely discovered.

Don't worry. The quiz is hard for everybody. Do your own research, make your own guesses, and remember to have fun! Good luck, and keep the rubber side down.